Archive for 'Fun with Headlines' Category


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Ah, Think I’ll Call it a Sheep

2010 April 22 by Mr. D

I learned something today. Jon Stewart, who apparently is now arbiter of common language usage, has decided that the use of the term “Obamacare” is somehow derogatory and, based on the video clip that you can find here, the equivalent of using the charming term “teabagger.”
 
I’ll admit I found this mystifying, but apparently the bien pensants [...]

Because Every State Really Ought to Have Two Ridiculous Proto-Teutonic Candidates for Governor

2010 January 27 by Mr. D

I’m not sure if Arnold Schwarzenegger is running for re-election in California, but there’s good news for our friends in the Golden State:
 

Move over Arnold, there’s another celebrity in the race for governor in California. Prince Frederic von Anhalt, the husband of actress Zsa Zsa Gabor, announced his intention to run as a liberal independent [...]

Martha and the Maguffins

2010 January 19 by Mr. D

It’s over. Martha Coakley has conceded and Scott Brown has won the special election in Massachusetts. Every good amateur pundit needs to have an opinion or two on such things, of course. So here are mine.

Scott Brown ran a hell of a good campaign. He’s a talented politician and he ran rings around Martha Coakley. [...]

In related news, the Tennessee Titans were declared the winners of Super Bowl XLIV today

2009 October 9 by Mr. D

Barack Obama wins the Nobel Peace Prize. A few thoughts:

The first point is obvious — even if he were to ever deserve such a “prestigious” prize, it’s way to early to tell. His administration has barely begun and it’s absurd to give it to him now.
In the president’s defense, I would say this — even [...]

Gatekeepers

2009 September 30 by First Ringer

Mother’s jugs of speed

2009 September 17 by Jeff Kouba

From here, not passing up a chance to use that post title,
A Linda woman, five months pregnant, is among nine people arrested in a sweep aimed at street-level drug dealers and users, a law enforcement official said Tuesday.
Nine suspects, all from Linda or Olivehurst, were arrested beginning Friday. Four more were being sought, said Mike [...]

Paging Harry Turtledove

2009 August 26 by Gary M. Miller

I was surprised to read earlier today that the late Senator Edward M. Kennedy was once a top prospect to play football for the Green Bay Packers.
Had Ted Kennedy given a different response to a letter from a Packers head coach, it’s possible Senator Ted Kennedy may have become Packers receiver Ted Kennedy.
The senator’s web [...]

Take my bike, please

2009 August 20 by SD63

H/T – www.roadbikerider.com
Take My Bike, Please
WASHINGTON, D.C. — The U.S. government’s popular “cash for clunkers” auto rebate program is just the beginning, Transportation Secretary Ray LaHood announced yesterday.
Next up: Dollars for ‘Dozers, in which the hard-hit construction industry can trade in its aging bulldozers and get money to buy new earth-moving equipment. That will be [...]

Favre the Ted Thompson Gunner

2009 August 18 by Mr. D

Apologies to Warren Zevon:
Brett Favre was a warrior from the Land of Hattiesburg
With a Thompson gun for hire, fighting was the word
The deal was made with Ron Wolf on a dark and stormy day
So he set out for Fox Valley to join the bloody fray
Through ninety-six and seven they fought the NFC war
Fingers on their [...]

Make that two or three million +1

2009 August 10 by Gary M. Miller

“There was an old Marxist called Lenin,
Who did two or three million men in.
That’s a lot to have done in,
But where he did one in,
A Marxist called Stalin did ten in.”

Headline:  Lenin statue collapses, kills man in Belarus

Inconvenient indeed

2009 August 5 by Gary M. Miller

Albert Gore, Jr. assured me that tornadoes and hurricanes were supposed to increase, not decrease…
Headline:  Tepid tornado season disappoints some
Headline:  Experts predict quieter Atlantic hurricane season

Happy Birthday, Mr. President

2009 August 4 by Gary M. Miller

I had hoped to be in D.C. for the pomp and circumstance of the President’s 48th birthday but events dictated otherwise.  Happily, a friend sent me some pics she snapped from both ends of the Mall. 

The girl from Ipanema fells Gov. Sanford

2009 June 24 by Gary M. Miller

Well, I guess she’s from Argentina.  Close enough for hand grenades (of the Max Cleland self-inflicted kind).

No need to panic

2009 June 10 by Gary M. Miller

because the guy who appointed you doesn’t know shit about economics.
New GM Chair Edward E. Whitaker, Jr.:  “I don’t know anything about cars.”

What year is this, 455 A.D.?!

2009 June 1 by Jeff Kouba

From AKI:
Vandals attack Rome museum

Most Peculiar, Mama

2009 May 29 by Mr. D

Nobody told me there’d be days like these/Strange days, indeed.
– John Lennon

Back in 1992 I was living in Chicago, preparing to move to Minnesota. Mrs. D and I made a trip up here and we decided to stop at the newly completed Mall of America. As we were walking by Oshman’s Super Sports store, I [...]


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